THIS is me…(23)By: Sarah Ann Walker
“Suzanne, do you really want your mother here?” He asks again very seriously.
“Um, no. Not really,” I whisper. Shit.
“It's okay; I promise you I won't repeat anything you say to me. Do you know why you don't want your mother here?”
“No, not really. My mother is very intense and uptight sometimes, and I think she'll be mad at me for being in a coma, which sounds weird I know, but she's like that. I think she'll be disappointed in me for being in the hospital because I was in a coma, so she won't be very nice to me.” Exhale.
“I understand, though being in a coma is a fairly good reason for being in the hospital, wouldn't you agree?” He asks while smirking at me. This guy is kind of funny.
“Yes, a coma sounds like a perfectly reasonable reason for being in the hospital but my mother isn't always so perfectly reasonable. So I try to never do anything wrong. And I think being in the hospital is wrong somehow, or at least she'll think it is. So I'm a little nervous about seeing her. Do you know when she should arrive?”
God, I’m going to have to prepare myself for her arrival so I'm not so scared when she gets here.
“Suzanne, your parents won't be visiting you anytime soon. They're unavailable at the moment so they can't be here with you. That may be disappointing, but-”
“Oh, it’s not! That's awesome. I really don't want to see her, so this worked out perfectly.”
Yes! My mother won't be here, so I'm okay for now. I wonder what they're doing, but then again, maybe if I know what they’re doing the doctor will find them and tell them I'm awake and then she'll come here. It’s probably best to not ask.
“Would you tell me when she's coming for me though? Would you please give me some notice so I can prepare myself for her? Is that okay, Dr. MacDonald?”
“Absolutely. I promise to let you know.”
Staring at the doctor he smiles at me and I feel like maybe I can trust him. He seems like he'll tell me when she's coming for me, so until then I'll try to relax a little.
“What are you thinking about, Suzanne?”
“Nothing. I'm... nothing. I'm good. How did I get here? What happened?”
“You had a car accident. Do you remember that?”
“No… I don't think so.”
An accident? Shit, I hope I was driving my car and not Marcus’. He'll kill me if I damaged his car.
“Was I driving Marcus car in the accident?”
“I was just wondering.”
“Why were you wondering?”
“It's nothing. I was just curious.”
“Why were you curious?” God, this guy is so pushy, but he does it all calm-like, so it’s kind of hard to ignore his questions when he sits so calmly waiting for my response.
“Marcus loves his car. I just wanted to make sure I didn't damage it so he wouldn't be mad at me. That's all.”
“I wonder if he would still be angry at you if you did crash his car, even though you were seriously injured, AND you've just woken from a coma. Don't you think he would care more about your safety and health than for his car?”
“No, not really.” Ooops. “Oh, of course he would, but he would still be disappointed if I crashed his car.” Ugh. This still sounds bad. “No, I'm sure he wouldn't be disappointed. Marcus will be thrilled that I'm better now, I know he will be.”
“Are you sure?”
“Of course. Marcus loves me, and he would choose me over his car. I'm sure of it.” Am I?
“Well, that's good. And you can relax because you didn't crash his car, though even if you had you're certainly worth much more than a car.”
Looking at the doctor, I'm suddenly overcome with emotion. Why the hell am I crying? He was just being nice, and I'm crying over his niceness? I'm crying?
“Are you okay? Why are you so sad suddenly?”
“I’m not sure. You just said something nice and it made me cry, I think. It's pathetic really, but hearing Marcus would pick me over his car feels good. I know it's probably stupid to you but it means something to me, I think.”
“That’s not stupid. Everyone wants to know that they're valuable to someone else. Everyone wants to feel important to someone else. And everyone, myself included, wants to know they're more important than, say, a car.” Smirk again.